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Thoughts of HoMan

by Apollonian from Spring, TX

Last Post 14 days, 5 hours Ago


On Becoming Illegal.

FORMS ARE GOING FAST- SIGN UP TODAY!
 
Becoming Illegal (Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator)

 
The Honorable Tom Harkin

731 Hart Senate Office Building

Phone (202) 224 3254

Washington DC, 20510

 
Dear Senator Harkin,

 
As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

 
My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.

 
Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.

 
Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.

 
Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as 'in-state' tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.

 
Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car.

 
If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.

 
Your Loyal Constituent,

Donald Ruppert

Burlington , IA

 
Get your Forms (NOW)!! Call your Internal Revenue Service 1-800-289-1040.
 
 
13 Comments |  Add a Comment

Member Comments Total Comments: 13
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torchbearer read my blog view my photos
Jul 8, 2008 | 6:50 PM

You are a learned & talented blogger, Apollo--
NICE to read posts/comments by intelligent folks!

It has almost gotten tho that point--the point of ABSURDITY--

(Kinda makes you wonder, as brilliant & humorous as Americans are--that they would let this happen!)

Thanks for the post!

Donnelly read my blog view my photos
Jul 8, 2008 | 9:08 PM

Cute. But now you have to work as a night janitor and risk being deported to a third world hell-hole. Enjoy your stay.

redtractortom read my blog
Jul 8, 2008 | 9:11 PM

I wonder if sending this to our senators would do any good? Torchbearer, I'm waiting for the law to knock on my door after I sent the blog you posted about the e-mail! I had seen this one a couple of years ago and just laughed at it but it's no laughing matter! We are overrun with illegals and have to press "1" for english!

Sassy11 read my blog
Jul 9, 2008 | 9:45 AM

I can tell you something funny. A couple of people use the "No Comprende or No Ingles" line. Well, they get a wake up call when someone speaks back to them in Spanish. Properly explaining to them what they can hear, but don't want to really hear...LOL

FYInfo read my blog view my photos
Jul 9, 2008 | 10:42 AM

Time and again we never learn from history.
Even biblical days, Babel collapsed once the common language was confused into multiply tongues.
The strength of a Nation is a one language Nation
To pander to a foreign, depressed alien tongue and try to immerse it with the original tongue of the land only confuses and weakens its people's progress over others who hold fast to their native language.
Wonder why America is becoming second rate !!
Wonder why many area's are looking like the border towns and it's crime rates.

BessieLou read my blog view my photos
Jul 9, 2008 | 11:38 AM

Touche!!!!!!!!!!

I'm getting poorer and the days go by. Took a paycut to keep my job and now, cant even buy necessities. Send me an app please...My kids need medical and dental.

Wonderful-World read my blog view my photos
Jul 9, 2008 | 5:28 PM

Love it.

Gottaluvit read my blog view my photos
Jul 9, 2008 | 7:19 PM

You just might be onto something there. Let's all get in line. I Love it.

whatever_71 read my blog view my photos
Jul 9, 2008 | 11:45 PM

Great post love the comments. I would love not to pay all that money out in taxes, college,medical,etc. I could finally be above the proverty level then. That way I could trade my cardboard box for a house.

hereandnow read my blog
Jul 10, 2008 | 8:20 AM

Cute, it has reached the point of absurdity, maybe beyond. I actually called a local satellite provider the other day and had to press "2" for english, imagine that, still can't believe it.

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Apollonian

I am just your normal kilt wearing Texans fan. Texan born and proud of it. I have varied opinions about many issues, as you might have already read. I do like a great discussion, some would call arguements...you say tomatoe, I say tomato. Be happy while you're living, for you're a long time dead.

Member Since: 12/20/2006